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My Ex Boyfriend Is Ignoring Me – What Do I Do Now?

It is common in a lot of relationship breakups. You wait for him to call, you sit clutching your phone, waiting for a text. You check your social media constantly, thinking that you have missed something. But there’s nothing. It is as if he has disappeared off the face of the planet. Not only is this incredibly painful, but it is proving more and more difficult for you to keep away from him. Every urge in you is telling you to pick up the phone. An innocent text to see how he is shouldn’t hurt, should it? 

The sad truth is that it will hurt. It will hurt you, and badly. If your ex boyfriend is ignoring you, he is doing it for a reason. Sending him constant texts and emails will not work in your favour. In fact, it can have the opposite effect that you want. If you think that you can coerce your ex boyfriend into talking to you again, you need a reality check. I’m afraid that it doesn’t work that way.

The thing is, you want him to want to contact you again. You don’t want him to feel guilty and forced into talking to you again. This will just be awkward and make him feel sorry for you. It will negatively impact your chances of getting him back too. It is a fine line to walk, but it can be done. You can actually make him eager to contact you, just like it was in the old days, when you first got together.

You have to go about this completely differently if you want him to stop ignoring you and actually want to communicate with you again. The good news is that this is possible and it is actually kind of easy once you start to understand male psychology. But more about that later. First you need to understand why your ex boyfriend ignores you, so that you can nip this behaviour in the bud and open the channels of communication again.

Why Your Ex Boyfriend Is Avoiding You

Things are never quite what they seem. Just because your ex boyfriend is ignoring you, it doesn’t mean that he hates you are he wants you to disappear. It could be quite the opposite in fact. After a relationship breakdown emotions are fraught, your feelings are confused and you just need time to process what has happened. This is natural.

He Is Confused

Do you think he just turned his feelings off for you like a tap? Luckily it doesn’t work like that. Even if he was the one who broke up with you, he will be dealing with a lot of residual feelings for you and trying to process them. It is likely that he is confused about these mixed feelings, so taking himself away from you seems like the best solution right now. He cannot work out how he really feels about you if he is always around you, that would be too hard for him. He needs space too.

He Feels Awkward Around You

Another reason why your ex boyfriend is ignoring you after the breakup is because things feel awkward. You feel this awkwardness too, don’t you? It is hard to know how he should interact with you in the days and weeks after your split. You can hardly go back to how things were, affection and normal conversation are a bit too much to ask. Both of your feelings are hurt. This awkwardness will dissipate over time, but right now respecting his space is key. You want to give him the time to come to terms with what has happened and come to the conclusion that he misses you. He cannot miss you if you are constantly in touch with him, can he? The more you text or call him, the more he will retreat into himself. Take a step back now if you are to have any chance of winning him back down the road.

He Is Trying To Protect You From More Hurt

Perhaps he just doesn’t want to see you upset. Every time you see eachother after the break up, there are tears, too many questions, confusion and anger. No one wants to face that all the time. Maybe all of the heightened emotions are too much for him to deal with at the moment. He doesn’t know what to say to you to make you feel better, so he has taken the decision to detach from you until your emotions have calmed down. The last thing that he wants to do is to apologise constantly for what went wrong or feel under pressure to answer a barrage of questions from you. It is just too awkward. The more pressure that you put on him to talk, the more likely he is to clam up and skulk off into dark corners, leaving you even more confused.

He Wants To Make You Suffer

It is difficult to face up to, but perhaps your ex boyfriend wants to make you suffer. Maybe a lot of ugly and nasty things were said when you were breaking up. It’s normal. Things get said in the heat of the moment when both parties are emotional, things that cannot be unsaid. He will remember everything that came out of your mouth and he could still be reeling from it. He has feelings too. You still have the capacity to hurt him deeply with your words. He will care what you think of him, despite your breakup.

He Is Trying To Provoke A Reaction

Wanting to punish your ex is a typical reaction to a breakup. One that is all too common. Maybe he wants to get a reaction from you and feels that ignoring you is the most effective method there is. The more you add fuel to the fire, by nagging him and sending him texts, the more he will feel justified in ignoring you. You are telling him very clearly that his technique is working well and that he should keep it up. He expects you to progressively get more and more desperate to hear from him. He wants an emotional response from you. DON’T GIVE HIM WHAT HE WANTS! Take the high road and act like it doesn’t matter. You will soon see a change in behaviour from him. When panic sets in that you are not bothered anymore.

He Is Grieving

Your Boyfriend is going through a mourning period. Breaking up is a grieving process and it takes time. He probably is angry towards you, has all of these confused feelings and bottled up hurt. It will take some time before you hear from him again. He could want to do things on his own terms and make you wait. Sometimes you have to accept this and be patient. The more that you push, the more you will be hit with a blank screen and an empty inbox.

He Thinks You Are Crazy

Another reason why an ex boyfriend ignores his ex girlfriend is kind of obvious. I hate to say it, but he could just want to get away from you because he thinks you are crazy. Admit it. You have been barraging him with emotional messages, sending him emails, contacting him on Facebook and asking his friends how he is. Heck, you have probably stalked him in the hope to just ‘accidentally’ bump into him. You foolishly thought that he wouldn’t notice, that you were being subtle. Sadly, he will be watching you and your behaviour very closely after the breakup. He will know what you are up to and he will be starting to get alarmed.

It is normal to be an emotional wreck post breakup, but you cannot let him see you like this. Please refrain from sending him romantic, angry or pleading texts. Not only will it make you look highly unattractive and desperate, he will begin to see you as mentally unstable and worry for his own wellbeing. The last thing that he wants is for him to leave his home and find you standing there with a long range camera in the bushes, trying to get a glimpse of him and figure out where he is off to.

The more you try to contact him and find out how he feels, the more crazy and unstable you will look to him. He will be afraid of you at worst, and pity you at best. You don’t want him to feel either of these things if you want to get back together. He has to be attracted to you and this won’t happen if you are behaving like a crazed lunatic who has just escaped from a mental asylum. Take a step back, or four, and honestly ask yourself how your behaviour looks to your ex. Then you can start to change the way your ex boyfriend sees you and make headway in winning back his heart.

You Have to Make Him Want To Talk To You

You can’t do this through romantic pleas or using coercion and manipulation. You have to be cleverer than this. The best way is to make him want to reach out and contact you of his own volition. Make him think that it is own choice. Not through guilt or pity either, but because he genuinely misses you and wants to see what you are up to. You may think that this is an impossible task given that you have already made a massive fool of yourself and he seems completely adverse to any communication with you. Never fear though, you can turn things around when you understand a little bit about male psyche.

If you play your cards right, he could be sending you a text within the next week. It is up to you, the more self control you have, the quicker you will see a text from your ex boyfriend in your inbox.

The truth is, your ex boyfriend has read all of the texts you have sent him. He has listened to your drunk voicemails that you wish you could erase. He has seen all of your posts on Facebook and your social media updates. He even knows that you have been asking his friends and family about him. He knows it all, every sordid detail. Unfortunately you cannot take these actions back or hit a reset button in his brain so that he forgets completely about these things. What you can do now is to change how he views you for good.

The easiest way to do this to stop communicating with him completely. That’s right. Pull the plug. Go incognito for a while, make him think that you have fallen down a big black hole never to be seen again. This just doesn’t mean that you stop sending him personal texts and messages. Oh no. You have to go the whole hog here. Your Facebook and other social media platforms will not be seeing you for a while either. I am serious about this, and you should be too if you really want him back.

Staying off social media, snap chat etc, is a VERY POWERFUL strategy in winning back his affections. Not only will it make him sit up suddenly and take notice of you again, it will make him start to wonder, where has she gone? Is she alright? Is she over me? Is she seeing someone new? Why is she suddenly ignoring me now? See how effective this is? In one fell swoop you have managed to turn the tables on him and taken the power back. Now you are in control. That is a very liberating feeling and one that you should be using to its full potential.

Okay, so you have turned off your social media accounts, deactivated them even. Now you can start to make changes in your own life. You should be using this quiet time constructively. Think of it as YOU TIME. You deserve it after all of those countless hours blubbering into your pillow. Get back your confidence. Go out with friends, get an new outfit, a new haircut. Anything that makes you feel good about yourself again. If you start behaving like the old you, it will not go unnoticed by your ex boyfriend. Soon word will spread that you are happy, busy and social again. These are attractive traits remember. Sitting sulking and lamenting in your pjs is not the look you want to go for here.

You will be surprised just how effective these little changes can be. Before long, you will hear from your ex boyfriend. He has been used to your constant contact for weeks. Now it is dead silent. Eerily quiet. He doesn’t like it. His male ego is taking a knock as he realised that he is not getting the attention anymore. He secretly enjoyed the fact that he had you wrapped around his little finger, that you would jump if he said so. He wanted to be in control. He has lost that control now and you have taken it back. Now he has to make the effort and reach out to you.

Let’s take a second and learn what will be going through your ex boyfriend’s mind when you cease contact. Men are not complicated creatures. They will react largely in the same way when they don’t hear from you again. When your ex does contact you again, you can take it as a huge hint that he still has feelings for you, otherwise he just wouldn’t bother making the effort.

Your evident lack of interest and communication will send him off into panic mode. He will become extremely paranoid and his mind will be imagining all sorts. He pretty much counted on the fact that he would keep hearing from you and that he could snap his fingers whenever he wanted and you would come running. Now that you have made it clear that this isn’t going to happen, he is starting to worry. He will also start to experience a lot of paranoia at this stage. His mind will be imagining all sorts. Perhaps you have found a new guy and are out having fun, getting over him fast. Maybe you just don’t care about him anymore? Your feelings have changed and you have given up on him.

Either way, he won’t want you to forget about him if he still loves you. The very real threat of losing you for good will make him take fast and decisive action. He will have to reach out to you if he stands any chance of rekindling your relationship. Best thing is, you didn’t have to plead on him to contact you, he will do that all by himself. Reverse psychology is a powerful thing.

Making him miss you is key to getting him to stop ignoring you. How can he miss you if you are always there barraging him with calls and texts? It is a common misconception that your ex boyfriend will forget about you and move on if he doesn’t hear from you. Women think that they have to remind their exes that they still exist. Not so. Creating a sense of mystery is a good thing. Not being available all the time is attractive. Making him miss you is a very compelling feeling, one that will encourage him to act.

What To Do When Your Ex Boyfriend Contacts You

It is all well and good having a strategy in place to get your ex boyfriend to speak to you again, but what do you do when you hear that beep from his number? Do you ignore him and let him stew or do you tell him that you love him and want him back? It is crucial that you play it right if you want him back. There is no point in doing all that hard work cutting contact if you are going to blow it as soon as he calls. You need to take a proven approach.

Knowing what to say to him, how often to contact him, when to reply and how to act, are essential components in getting back your ex boyfriend. If he shows up at your door unexpectedly, you will need to know how to interact with him to leave him wanting more. Luckily there are proven psychological strategies that can drill into his mind. Ones that have been effective for thousands of other girls in your situation. It would be a bad idea to go into this blind and hope for the best. You might just find yourself back at square one with your ex boyfriend wanting nothing to do with you.

Being as prepared as possible will stop you from making embarrassing mistakes that will put him off you for good. There are psychologists that have done a lot of research into male psychology for you and will give you exactly what you need to know to get the best results. Don’t worry, they have cut out the boring sciency bits and get straight to the point. One such system is the Text Your Ex Back System. Based on years of psychological research, you can start to use simple texts to encourage your ex to love you again. It will break down exactly what to do in each situation. When to contact him, how long to wait between texts and what to say. That is not all though. There are so many more tricks and strategies that you should be using to get faster results. Click the video above to learn about your next steps and what you should be doing now to increase your chances of getting your ex boyfriend back.


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